Valentine’s Day can present a minefield of awkward interactions for online daters. What’s worse is there’s a ton of conflicting information online. A lot of the social rules have quickly become old-fashioned and out-dated.
That’s why we’ve done the research on modern online daters’ likes/dislikes and general expectations around the Valentine’s Day season. And, today, we bring you these definitive dos and don’ts!
Don’t purposely schedule a first date on V-Day
Apparently, the internet is full of old-school, grandmotherly types shouting, “Be sure to find a date for Valentine’s Day!” Please do not do this.
Valentine’s Day is a holiday wrought with expectations of l-o-v-e. First dates should never be so much pressure! Rather, the best first dates feel light-hearted and non-committal (like a quick coffee on a Tuesday).
Do play it cool if you accidentally schedule a first date on V-Day
According to one 20-something female:
“I had an accidental first date on February 14th. In text, it was just like, ‘How’s Sunday?’ I literally didn’t know it was Valentine’s Day until, on the train, everybody around me was holding red roses. I was so embarrassed. But I got to the gallery, he didn’t have flowers or anything, and it was just like a regular date.”
Do acknowledge the holiday if you’re talking to someone on a dating site/app
But keep it light, casual, chill! Just because it’s Valentine’s Day does not mean that you’re at a place in your relationship for sensual romance.
Meet the holiday where your relationship is. Like, if you’ve been talking to someone on Bumble for a day or two prior to February 14th, it’s okay to say, “Happy v-day!” Or to make a joke about it, if you have the opportunity. Maybe you have funny memories of valentine exchanges in elementary school? Those are fair game.
Do give a small gift to someone you’ve been seeing for a few weeks/months
If you’ve been seeing someone, but it’s still really early in the relationship (like you-haven’t-deleted-your-Tinder-profile-yet early), it’s okay to make a date for February 14th.
If you’ve been seeing the person for a few weeks, consider making them a silly Valentine’s Day card or something similar, but stay away from real gifts and anything too serious, expensive, or formal.
If you’ve been seeing the person for a few months, a small gift of candy or flowers should do it. No clothes, perfume, cologne, or jewelry, though. These can come across as overly eager to get to something more.
If you’ve been seeing the person for a few months AND IT’S GOING REALLY WELL, you can be super slick and gift the person another date with you! Think: not-too-expensive concert tickets; a ball game; a restaurant you’ve been meaning to try. This is a step up from candy without feeling awkwardly over-the-top.
Well I hope these tips help you keep the awkwards at bay this conversation heart season! We’ll see you back on Photofeeler with the pic that makes you secretly feel sexy.
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